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Saturday Showcase: Everybody Poops May 28, 2011

Posted by J. in Genius, Other People's Genius, Sticks and String.
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You know what sucks?  When you give the toddler a chocolate chip cookie and he eats it happily, then you start to smell poop and see said toddler with brown smears all over his face and hands.  Then worse, you see a large, brown, splotch on the back of his shirt and shorts, and you realize that you don’t know where the chocolate ends and the poop starts.

This shit isn’t in the parenting manuals.  If I ever write my book, it’s going to be called “Your Life Is About to Become All About Bowel Movements” by Poops Lacey.  I’m starting to think I should add a category of posts just titled “Shit Stories”.

Did I mention I had to give him a bath after lunch on Thursday because he had spaghetti from eyeball to asshole and while soaking he dropped a deuce in the tub?  When you’re a parent, odds are good you will have to scoop some floaters (or sinkers) out of the bathtub at some point.  Good times, good times.

So in an homage to the great Memorial Day Weekend Cookie/Crap Debacle of 2011, I have curated a little collection I call “Poops’ Festival of Feces.”

Did I mention that clicking the pictures takes you to the actual listing on Etsy where you can buy the item if you like, or poke around in the seller’s shop to see the other interesting things contained therein?  ‘Cause you totally can.

Don't Scare Me I Poop Easily Funny Wood Sign by CountryWorkshop

I'd Love to Be a Bird by beanforest

Chocolate Pearls with Rabbit Clasp and Earrings by ErikaMayDesigns

Pattern: Pooping Dog Amigurumi by sandsteeldesigns

Bigfoot Breaks Into Some Dude's Cabin and Totally Takes a Fat Dump in His Toilet 8 x 10 Art Print by Legendary Tiger Hero

Real Moose Poop Doo-Doo Nugget Necklace by sharkman123

Chocolate Walnut Fudge: Binky's Yummy Seashore Fudge by SexyStitches

I Eat Rainbows and Poop Butterflies Wallet by SassyFace

Daddy Scoops My Poop Flare Dog Tag by HugAPugStudios

8 oz. Hershey Squirts All Natural Soy Candle by katherinesnaturals

The Deuce Ring by metalsugar

Pattern: I'm So Goth I Poop Bats by DefiantDamsel

E Coli Vintage French Medical Microscope Image Pendant/Tie Tack by spiffycool

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Comments»

1. Karen - May 28, 2011

We traveled cross-country by train this spring. The only time we got off the train other than to change trains was in CO. There was a tiny gift shop at the station, and we went in to see if we could find a gift for our grandson’s fifth birthday. They had a rack of rocks and minerals found in the area — and the perfect gift. Coprolite — dinosaur poop. What better for a little boy? He loved it.


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